The bus finally arrived to her disappointment and she looked back at the peaceful old man and dropped her tokens into the slot. She walked down the aisle trying to maintain her balance. She loved wearing high heels but surely the inventor never thought a lady would be walking on a moving vehicle when he designed them. Kerri quickly wondered if the inventor was a he or a she; who did invent high heels? There were two seats available. One seat was near the window in between a young woman breast feeding and a kid swaying to the beat pouring out of his headphones. The other seat was towards the back next to an old thin woman holding on to a green mesh beach bag. Kerri moved towards the back as well as she could and made sure her skirt was straight underneath her as she sat down next to the old woman smiling at her. Kerri returned the smile and looked over to the young woman breast feeding. Memories of her daughter's first attempts at breast feeding made her giggle inside. Little Emily couldn't get her mouth around her nipple, her mouth was so small. Eventually she mastered getting her mouth around her nipple but then Kerri had to hold her breast because Emily's little face would get buried by the breast and she would struggle for air. Kerri remembered her husband Gary laughing at poor little Emily's waving arms and legs trying to escape from the monsters, as he called them, and at his wife's attempts to be patient and motherly. It had taken a few days for the mother and child to get used to the first days of milk production. Kerri had no idea there would be so much. She never imagined her breasts being that size and being that heavy. Her second child, Justin, didn't have a problem. Kerri had mastered breast feeding by then and Gary really didn't pay much attention to the feedings. She felt a nudge on her elbow, it was the old lady.
"Do you know how much longer to Pearson Street, young miss?" she nodded as she asked.
Kerri felt herself staring and smiled, "Yes, you have three more stops to go, so that's a-- about five minutes." The old lady had nodded the whole time and now gave Kerri a bigger nod of acknowledgment and bent over to fix her wool socks that were slowly creeping down towards her ankles. Kerri looked away to give her some privacy.
This was her favorite part of the day, lately. It was usually a peaceful twenty minute ride. Lately, the closer the bus got to her destination the more intense her anticipation grew. She brushed her hair again to make sure it was cascading the right way just like Louann had taught her at the salon. Then she checked her make-up in the little mirror that she had received for Mother's Day from Emily and Justin. Mrs. Aldridge their pre-school teacher had instructed the class in decorating a mirror with paper, paint and a picture. On one side it was a mirror and on the other it was a picture of Emily and Justin. They were a year apart but they were allowed to be in the same class together this summer. They had become very close and inseparable. Kerri patted her face with some tissue being careful not to ruin her face. She had begun to perspire a little. It was only 9:30 and it was 87 degrees. She popped a piece of gum in her mouth and waited for her stop. The old lady next to her started to stir and she felt a nudge again.
"Could you pull the string , young miss?" she asked nodding, with a smile.
Kerri reached over and pulled the string. The old lady got up and headed towards the door without much trouble with balance. She was wearing a red wool coat and a hat. Kerri wondered if she felt the 87 degrees that everyone else felt in the city. The old lady didn't have a sign of perspiration or discomfort while Kerri could feel her clothes starting to stick to her moist skin.
Kerri checked the mirror again for one last look. She was happy to see the healthy glow on her skin; the result of gardening all weekend. Her hair was still where it was supposed to be. She looked at the picture of her children and put the mirror away. She pulled the string and wobbled over to the door. She was trying to keep calm but her heart suddenly felt very heavy. The bus got closer to her stop and her breathing quickened and she felt queasy. She decided to count to try to slow her heart down. She held on to the pole as the bus pulled up to the corner and opened the doors. She felt a stupid smile form on her face as she leapt off the bus. This is really the best part of her day, she thought as she straightened her skirt and blouse. She felt better now, she only felt butterflies bouncing off the walls of her stomach, her intestines and probably her liver or was that her spleen? Nonetheless, her anticipation was almost over as she peered around the corner to the stand. Wait a minute. The stand seemed unattended. Maybe if she got closer---she thought. No, the stand was empty. Kerri was filled with a disappointment greater than any other she had ever felt.
She was in front of the stand now and she was trying to fight the tears from coming and ruining her make-up. She still had to be at work in an hour. Then she noticed something move. She got closer and tried peering over the stand by standing on her toes. She felt a rush of heat run up her spine when she saw the top of his head and then his big brown eyes and then his beautiful smile..
"What in the world is wrong with you?" he looked at her with a raised eyebrow and continued to rise until he was standing. He dusted his white shirt off with his hands and straightened his tie.
Kerri was so happy she wanted to grab him and never let him go. She felt herself smiling uncontrollably. Stop it, she thought, you're making a fool out of yourself. She was trying to explain. "Uh, I mean, I was paying attention and a cab almost--I mean-- I --anyway I'm O.K. I guess. What were you doing down there?" she finally got it out, she was trying to act as normally as possible.
"I was trying to fix this shelf down here. I think I've got it under control now. Do you want a cup of coffee or something?" he was grounding some beans and he was trying to shout over the machine.
Kerri watched his hands working.They were smooth, soft, gentle, hands-- definitely not working hands. He was an actor and was doing this to pay the rent. Kerri wondered how his hands would feel on her skin.
"Well, Kerri, do you want a cup of coffee, hot chocolate, expresso, a donut, cookie, croissant--" he stopped and asked someone else if they needed help. He immediately started putting their order together.
Kerri wondered what her kids were doing in school. She wondered about Gary but then quickly changed the subject. She looked over at Josh working with his young hands. He was only one year younger but it seemed as if they were a generation apart. She was married at twenty and now was only twenty-six.
She thought about the trip Josh had mentioned. She had never been on a boat and never had dreamed of being on a yacht. She had thought about it for a week and now there was no other answer. Kerri stared at his eyes and every moment that he could he would look over to her in between grounding and pouring. Kerri felt her heart start up again so she began to count.
"Well, beautiful, have you decided yet?" he asked again with a warm, tender look. They were alone and the sounds of the city had disappeared. Kerri didn't notice the traffic noise nor did she notice the constant chatter of the people passing by. She longed for his hands to touch her. She longed for his lips to feel the warmth of her skin. She could feel her mirror through her cloth bag and she held on to it and looked up into his eyes.
"Yes, I 've decided," she said slowly as she let go of her mirror and smiled.
. Stay tuned for the final conclusion...............