Red Iguana Dawn

Episode 3: Religion For Renegades

From: sprowell@grape.cs.utk.edu (Stacy Prowell)
Subject: RED IGUANA DAWN, Episode 3: RELIGION FOR RENEGADES
Date: 14 Mar 1994 20:02:08 GMT
Message-ID: <2m2fs0INN5a7@CS.UTK.EDU>

[Once again, we return to the hideout of the Masked Red Iguana, Defender of Religion, Faith, and the 18th Century, PUBLIUS. When last we left, Publius' sidekick, Ferret Boy, had just gone out to the car, fearful that Publius had been broken by the Vile Yellow-Bellied Scourge of Atheists, and that these Godless Fiends were even then closing in on the hideout, using the FAX number to guide them.]

[As we return, we find that Ferret Boy has once more entered the hideout to collect his toothbrush and night light from his room. The perceptive eyes of the Mighty Publius spy him and we hear our hero say...]

In article <2kd7cr$9rl@inca.gate.net>, publius@inca.gate.net (Publius) writes:
|>  When I first tuned in to 'alt.atheism' about a month ago and read
|>  the FAQ, I saw it as an exercise in sophistry not logic, and the
|>  posting exchanges have been mostly sophistic,lots of non sequiturs, 
|>  - seemingly impenetrable to a logical presentation.

[Ferret Boy stops and looks into the Pube Cave's Control Center]

Ferret Boy: Oh, you sound like yourself again. [Ferret Boy walks into the Control Center and stands by Publius, who is twisting dials and punching buttons on the massize Mozumderizer.]

|>  I'm sure this Generation is as intelligent as the past but, obviously
|>  it has been subjected to a peculiar 'learning process'.

Ferret Boy: Damn that learning process!

[Publius raises an eyebrow and stares intently at sheaf of computer paper]

|>  There is talk now that the FAQ be up-graded to tackle the vexing 
|>  "Atheism is a Religion" problem created by PUBLIUS.

Ferret Boy: Har! Now they'll learn the extent of your Powers, right O Iguana of Redness?

|>  In view of the
|>  above, nothing useful will come of that.

Ferret Boy: But isn't that the linch-pin of your argument?

|>  We'll see another 'strawman'
|>  question and answer.

Ferret Boy: [Looking at his feet] Uh, I had to dismantle the Strawman Argument Generator to build the Orobouric Argument Generator. I meant to tell you, honest! I tried, but you stated yelling "Atheism is a Religion!" and I left until you quieted down.

[Publius looks out a window at the sky and scowls, apparently taking no notice of Ferret Boy's revelation]

|>  As I wonder what kind of World this Atheist Generation will create
|>  when it takes over, unburdened by the "religious idiocy" of its
|>  Christian, Jewish and Islamic Fore-fathers, I can only shake my head.

Ferret Boy: You haven't given up hope, have you?

|>  But then - I'm watching the Winter Olympics on TV and what I see is
|>  not Bad News at all!

Ferret Boy: Uh, we don't have a TV. I had to scavenge parts to patch up the Logic Mangler. Remember? The if-and-only-if-not gates all blew. I also had to use some parts from the Anti-Nomologizer and the Onanism Feedback Loop (patents pending).

[Publius looks longingly at the dictionary on the top shelf, then turns away and runs his hand lovingly over his tatoo of James Madison]

|>  I am re-assured.

Ferret Boy: I'm not.

|>  Perhaps what I have been experiencing on
|>  'alt.atheism' is an exaggerated picture of the influence of Atheism
|>  on Society. And now I wonder who should really despair -
|>  I or the Hard Line Atheists.

Ferret Boy: Well then, what about the FAX number?

|> ,                                      PUBLIUS
|>    :
|>

[What will happen next? Will more hardware be sacrificed in the name of illogic? Will we ever see the Publiusmobile? Will our hero ever even leave the hideout, for that matter? Tune in next time and see!]

-- 
-- _Stacy Prowell_______sprowell@utkcs.utk.edu_
  |                                            |
  | The mysterious UNIX paradigm:              |
  |                                            |
  |   "No design is better than a bad design." |
  |                             - Ken Thompson |
  |____________________________________________|

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