Red Iguana Dawn

Episode 21: Feuding With God

From: sprowell@grape.cs.utk.edu (Stacy Prowell)
Subject: RED IGUANA DAWN, Episode 21: FEUDING WITH GOD
Date: 22 Mar 1994 16:26:50 GMT
Message-ID: <2mn68aINNda9@CS.UTK.EDU>

[Our Heroes are trapped beneath the ocean in the PubeDome, between the harsh reality of starvation and the Vile and Despicable Alternative of Listening to Reason. Needless to say, Our Heroes are in a jam.]

[Ferret Boy, Loyal Sidekick of the Masked Red Iguana, aka "et. al.," carefully examines the lock on the door to the PubeDome Control Room, while the Woe to Atheists and Bane of Autonomous Men, the Mighty Publius reads his email.]

In article <2lgqtc$vsb@inca.gate.net>, publius@inca.gate.net (Publius) writes:
> iI've received E-mail objecting to the lumping of "Liberalism"
> with "Atheism"(in politics) in the answer to 'QUESTION SIX'.

Ferret Boy: Have you received any replies from the Pig Farmers, Creationist Morons, and Religious Idiots? I sent out the call for help over an hour ago. [Turning back to the door] Who knows what that Damnable Atheist is doing in there Even As We Speak!

> Well - just because someone says he is an Atheist I don't have
> to believe it.

Ferret Boy: Are you saying that Knowledgius is not really an atheist? You think we can convert him again?

> Especially if the 'atheism' is based on a kind 
> of "God" that is created in the Image of Man with certain grand
> capabilities but essentially just as dumb as Man

Ferret Boy: You know, I hadn't thought of Knowledgius in those terms. That means he is just as dumb as we are! Oh, joy! [Does a little Ferret Dance around the dock]

> - and being
> all powerful,

Ferret Boy: [Stops dancing] Uh, did you say "all powerful?"

> behaving in an outrageous and unfeeling manner
> toward his 'creation'.

Ferret Boy: He's behaving in an outrageous manner, yes, but what do you mean "creation?"

> That is an easy 'god' to hate and feud 
> with.

Ferret Boy: I don't have any idea where you are going with thi-

[Publius silences Ferret Boy with a wave of his Red- Iguana-Suited Arm. He turns to the Ferret Communicator and punches buttons. Knowledgius' face appears on the many screens. He is holding a piece of ladies underwear he has apparently just found in a drawer.]

Ferret Boy: Hey, leave that stuff alone! That doesn't concern you!

Knowledgius: Which one of you does it concern, Rodent Tike?

[Publius waves for silence.]

> The fact you say you are 'Atheists' but not 'Liberals tells
> me that your innate Nature is pushing through the facade.

Knowledgius: Huh? What do you mean?

> The odds 
> are even good that you are "Children of God" trying to find your
> way.

Knowledgius: The odds are good that you are losing it out there. [Stands] You want out, you listen to me.

> Just don't expect the real God to "stand up". His Form
> is a little more complex than that.    PUBLIUS

Knowledgius: Now I-

[Publius switches off the Communicator and smiles a Slow, Sly Iguana Smile. Ferret Boy, too, begins to grin.]

Ferret Boy: Oh, boy! You've got a plan, don't you, Masked Iguana?

Ferret Boy: [Resignedly] I'll take that as a yes...

[Does Publius have a plan to thwart Knowledgius? Or will Our Heroes be forced to listen to Reason? Tune in next time and see!]

-- 
-- _Stacy Prowell_____________sprowell@utkcs.utk.edu_
  |                                                  |
  | mutter mutter Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka    |
  | mumble mumble mutter mumble who are they anyway? |
  | mutter mumble mumble mutter...                   |
  |__________________________________________________|

Red Iguana Dawn Prev Next