Red Iguana Dawn
Episode 24: Star Trek: Atheist Friendly
From: sprowell@grape.cs.utk.edu (Stacy Prowell)
Subject: RED IGUANA DAWN, Episode 24: Star Trek: atheist friendly.
Date: 24 Mar 1994 17:36:40 GMT
Message-ID: <2msj39INNapb@CS.UTK.EDU>
[Our Mighty Iguana of Redness, Publius, has just thrown
down the gauntlet, demanding that Knowledgius summon the
Supreme Court to adjucate whether or not the Vile and
Contemptible Practice of Atheism constitutes a Religion.
Ferret Boy, his Faith sorely tested by the Wicked
Knowledgius, sobs quietly in a corner. Knowledgius and
Publius face one another via the Ferret Communicator.
Knowledgius is the first to speak...]
Knowledgius: Rodent Tike! Can you hear me?
Ferret Boy: [Looking up from the corner] Yes?
Knowledgius: He's lost it this time! Come on, I'll let
you in the Control Room! But hurry, before he loses
touch with reality completely and starts citing Star
Trek again! He only does that when he is really off
his rocker!
[Ferret Boy slowly rises and walks laboriously toward the
Control Room door... Suddenly Publius speaks!]
In article <2m2p0f$10k4@inca.gate.net>, publius@inca.gate.net (Publius) writes:
> On the contrary - I cite STAR TREK in my postings because it supports
> the logic of all "Life" Religions:
[Ferret Boy stops, waiting to hear what Our Hero will say
next.]
Knowledgius: Come on, Rodent Tike! Hurry up! He's
liable to start frothing at the mouth any second now!
> If Life occurs elsewhere in Space
> I mean Infinite Spece,
Knowledgius: Spece is a spice, sorta like dill.
[Our Mighty Hero, Publius ignores the interruption and
continues...]
> it follows that if one pursues Life to its
> ultimate configuration - and if STAR TREK went on logically, its
> authors would have to go beyond 'Q' and beyond that to come face to
> face with the Ultimate Configuration -
Knowledgius: [Rolling eyes] They did that. That was
Star Trek Five, remember? Didn't Shatner direct that
one?
> "God" - (sorry I can't come up
> with aword that suits you better).
Knowledgius: [Sits a little straighter and smiles]
Ah, neither can I...
> By then we would come up to a Form
> of Life that would be outside Time and Space and absolutely nnot
> comprehensible by our Senses - thus out of view of Atheists who
> recognize nothing as Real except what is recognized by the Senses.
Ferret Boy: Yes! Yes! Talk about the Egyptians,
please!
> The Ancient Egyptians would have loved STAR TREK.
Ferret Boy: Oh, I am sorry I ever doubted you, Masked
Iguana of Religiosity!
> And of that
> Ultimate Form of Life they said: "No Man shall know the Form of
> God." I go along with them.
[Publius turns to Ferret Boy...]
> (You sure you want to be an Atheist?)
> PUBLIUS
Ferret Boy: No! Never! (Spit, cva, hack, vomit,
convulse, gag!) I will never join the Yellow-Bellied
Renegade! I'd sooner die the death of the body trapped
here with you, Publius, than die the death of the spirit
with Knowledgius!
Knowledgius: [Angrily shaking his fist] Drat and double
drat you, Publius! You've won this round, but I still
have the upper hand! I'll summon the Atheists from
Logis to deal with you! Don't go anywhere! <snicker!>
[Knowledgius turns from the camera and concentrates.
Miles away, on the island of Logis, at the Atheist Base
of Operations, Arturo Magidin and Arch-Atheist Stacy
Prowell, Vile Thinkers of That Which Is Not To Be Thought,
are in the Communications Center.]
Arturo: How about that .sig generator you promised me?
Stacy: Well, I discovered that I needed to make some
changes to my awk scripts before I sent you a copy, and
I've been really lazy about getting around to it...
[The phone rings.]
Arturo: My turn. [Lifts receiver] Hello, skeptic
hotline. This is Arturo, your personal skeptic.
Knowledgius: I have sent out my psychic link-
Arturo: Bozo. [Hangs up] It's that pesky "psychic link"
woman again. We need to do something about her.
Stacy: I thought Dan said it was a man...
Arturo: [Frowns] Kinda hard to tell. Anyway, we can
get her -- or his -- number from the 900 number records.
[Our Heroes are still trapped in the PubeDome... and time
is running out! Will they escape? Will Ferret Boy's
Faith be tested again? What about Knowledgius? Will he
be forced to come out when the refrigerator is empty?
Look for the next episode of Red Iguana Dawn for answers
to these tough questions...]
--
-- _Stacy Prowell_____________sprowell@utkcs.utk.edu_
| |
| "I have made but one prayer to God, a short one: |
| `Oh Lord, make my enemies look ridiculous.' |
| And God granted it." - Voltaire |
|__________________________________________________|
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